In the realm of completely random and totally awesome

I have the. best. job. in. the. world. 

For multiple reasons.  But one of the fringe benefits is seeing super-cool things located at the kick-ass places where I’m traveling.
 

Like when I got to tour the world’s largest laser in 2011.

Which just happens to be where part of the new Star Trek movie was recently filmed.

 

So here's the Star Trek cast at NIF:

And here I am, a year or so before, with a whole host of other library information types touring NIF when it first opened:

 

And that's just totally superfantastic.  Because my childhood self was a complete Trekkie and, now, I've gotten as close as possible to having walked the halls of the Enterprise.

 

Touring the facility where Star Trek would eventually be filmed is quite obviously exactly the same as being on the Enterprise.

 

Or something like it.

 

But it's also insane amounts of fabulous because, let's face it, filming at NIF - a classified government facility - is twenty million times cooler than filming at the Anheuser-Busch brewery.

 

My only regret is not being there while filming actually occurred.

 

Because who wouldn't want to just randomly bump into Chris Pine in the small town of Livermore?

 

Press Release

LIVERMORE, Calif. -- The makers of "Star Trek: Into Darkness" went boldly where few have gone before when they visited Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory's National Ignition Facility (NIF), the world's largest and most energetic laser system. With the approval of the Department of Energy, this unique facility was utilized for the first time as a film set.

The filming was conducted in 2012 during a normal maintenance cycle for the facility. All additive costs were completely reimbursed by the film company so as to have no impact on NIF's experimental plan.

Just as the "Star Trek" genre envisions a brighter future for humanity through exploration of the universe, the mission of NIF is to explore physical realms that were previously unobtainable in a laboratory setting. With greater than 50 times more energy of previous lasers, NIF enables the nation to address scientific grand challenges in national security, fusion energy and fundamental science. Built as a centerpiece of the National Nuclear Security Administration's Stockpile Stewardship Program (SSP), NIF provides data required for maintaining the nuclear deterrent without the need for underground testing.

https://www.llnl.gov/news/newsreleases/2013/May/NR-13-05-05.html

Three reasons why Mother's Day sucks

I hate Mother’s Day.   

Not for the reason’s you’d expect, though.  Not because we lost our baby boy six months ago. 

But because I celebrated my first several Mother’s Days as a stepmother.   

For me, the holiday reminds me that I’m second-best in my oldest three children’s lives.  I might mother them the vast majority of the time, might have experienced almost every major milestone, might have invested every ounce of my being to shape the people they’re becoming, but Mother’s Day isn’t really about those things.  It’s about who legally “owns” the mother title.  And it’s not me.  Which means the day is empty because they are not with me. 

Granted, we always celebrate the following weekend.  They give me long-lasting hugs before they go with their mother, holding a bit more tightly, dropping the “J” in the “J-Mommy” to whisper “I love you, Mommy” before leaving.  I know they love me, know they feel like I’m a mother in my own right.  I know they are not slighting me because, legally, they have to go.  They have no choice.  And, even if they had the option, I would not want them to choose.  Because it’s unfair to them. 

But they’re still not here.  And, even with my toddler twins, the day is lonely.  Because I’m missing three-fifths of my children.  The house is quiet.  And, now, without Samuel, I am more fearful.  What if this is all?  What if there are no more? 

So the pain is a bit more acute this year. 

And I know that there are so many women out there who feel similarly, that Mother’s Day is a hurtful holiday, reminiscent only of what they do not have or what they have lost.  It’s a day of silent agony.  How can you celebrate the child you gave up for adoption?  How can you celebrate the baby you miscarried?  How can you celebrate the babies you cannot have because your body refuses to get pregnant?  How do you celebrate the intense desire to raise a family when you cannot find the right husband and father? 

It’s painful for me and I have two babies of my own.  How much more hurtful is today for the women who are mothers in desire or thought, but not in actuality?

This is for you, the mothers in love, hope, heart, desire and selflessness, but not in reality.

I hold you in my heart today.

The Wide Spectrum of Mothering

To those who gave birth this year to their first child—we celebrate with you

To those who lost a child this year – we mourn with you

To those who are in the trenches with little ones every day and wear the badge of food stains – we appreciate you

To those who experienced loss through miscarriage, failed adoptions, or running away—we mourn with you

To those who walk the hard path of infertility, fraught with pokes, prods, tears, and disappointment – we walk with you. Forgive us when we say foolish things. We don’t mean to make this harder than it is.

To those who are foster moms, mentor moms, and spiritual moms – we need you

To those who have warm and close relationships with your children – we celebrate with you

To those who have disappointment, heart ache, and distance with your children – we sit with you

To those who lost their mothers this year – we grieve with you

To those who experienced abuse at the hands of your own mother – we acknowledge your experience

To those who lived through driving tests, medical tests, and the overall testing of motherhood – we are better for having you in our midst

To those who have aborted children – we remember them and you on this day

To those who are single and long to be married and mothering your own children – we mourn that life has not turned out the way you longed for it to be

To those who step-parent – we walk with you on these complex paths

To those who envisioned lavishing love on grandchildren -yet that dream is not to be, we grieve with you

To those who will have emptier nests in the upcoming year – we grieve and rejoice with you

To those who placed children up for adoption — we commend you for your selflessness and remember how you hold that child in your heart

And to those who are pregnant with new life, both expected and surprising –we anticipate with you

This Mother’s Day, we walk with you. We remember you.

This beautiful writing is not my own, though I wish it were.  All credit goes to Amy Young @ http://www.messymiddle.com/2012/05/10/an-open-letter-to-pastors-a-non-mom-speaks-about-mothers-day/ and my lovely co-worker, Nicole, who posted it.